Without You....!

It is a world that i seldom understand. And in it there are winds of destiny, winds of change that blow when we least expect them to. Sometimes they gust forth with the fury of a hurricane and at other times, they barely kiss one's cheek. But the winds cannot be denied, bringing as they often do, a future impossible to ignore. You, my dear, are the wind that I never anticipated; the wind that has gusted more strongly than I had ever fathomed. You came into my life and transformed it forever. Things would never be the same again. You changed my attitude towards life, made me friendlier and outward-looking. You helped me make innumerable friends and made sure that we never lost touch.

The very thought of your delicate frame, those smooth curves and the remarkable ease with which your body slipped and then disappeared into my welcoming hands, sending my pleasure levels soaring, still sends shivers down my spine. I still remember those sharp, piercing and delirious sounds of ecstasy, the joyous expressions on your visage as my fingers ran through and caressed all parts of your anatomy. I made sure no part of your body was alien to me.

If only I could forget those long nights when i slept soundly, totally oblivious of the fact that you were up all night to ensure that I woke up on time for my exams; only to punched in the nose by an ungrateful me. I hurled the choicest abuses at you but you stayed calm and composed. You were always there to tell me the time when even the 'swatch' on my wrist had left me high and dry. We played games together, laughed together. How i miss those wonderful tunes sung by you to lift my spirits when i was down in the dumps. Even Barbara Streisand can only dream of matching your variations in tone, pitch and wavelength.

You selfless spirit, you never ever cared for your emotions, never gave voice to your feelings for me. On the contrary, you helped me patch up with my bitchy girlfriend just when we were about to breakoff. And yes, how can i forget those long, envious and desperate stares that you elicited from guys in my college (SRCC, DU). "Lucky b******" is what they used to mutter under thir breath. We were, so to say, made for each other.

Inspite of all that you were to me, I used to curse you at times when u disturbed me in the middle of a class. The entire class along with the antiquated professor would look accusingly at me for having violated their non-existent code of honour. Ah, but woe is me! I hardly realized your real worth and the place you had come to occupy in my life. You had become an inseparable part of me. Our lives had become entwined around each other's and I couldnt even leave for anywhere without you.

Who would have thought that one fateful day, I would wake up only to find myself sleeping alone, with you not beside me! Who would have thought that one stroke of luck, or rather the lack of it, would snatch you away from me.

This isnt the wind of change, the wind of destiny that I had bargained for. But then you dont always have your way. Life's like that. I had to rise above my deep sense of personal loss and woo someone all over again.

Only this time it was a NOKIA 7650!

Vivek Saraf.
Published in "A matter of opinion", The SRCC Debating Society Journal, 2004.